I Miss School.

So I'm gonna be honest here and just go ahead and say it: I hate summer. School is my life; it where all my friends are (I don't party so I don't see many of my friends outside of school), it's where the drum closet is, it's where I actually accomplish things, it's where I can sit on the stage and feel at home. Here, in my actual home, I feel caged. I have things that I could do, but the motivation to do them is so small I never do. I sit on Memebase and Youtube and get bored, and I'm surrounded by painful reminders of things that I don't want to deal with. I have nowhere to go, nobody to be with, and nothing to do to distract myself.

I miss AP English every morning, watching Carl Azuz on CNN Student news and writing 2 or 3 essays a week. I miss sitting in the drum closet during Wind Ensemble and looking at our Periodic Table of Percussion and drawing unicorns on the wall with a tube of lip gloss we found. I miss French I, being admired by my teacher (who was actually french!) for being so good at French after taking four years of Spanish (the two languages are very similar). I miss Precalc, and being the one person in the class who could actually follow what our teacher was explaining. I miss AP Physics, when I was constantly confused and amazed by the world we live in and the shenanigans our totally awesome teacher told us about. I miss AP Environmental Science, when I rarely did anything in class and was allowed to go sit in Jazz Band and play instead. I miss history, where my teacher was more of a conspiracy theorist than a historian and we did dozens of projects involving drawing, which is not my best strength.

I miss school lunches (even though I packed almost every day) when I was surrounded by band or theater drama, excitement over Pixar, sudden bursts of Man of la Mancha or RENT songs, and the smell of Chick-Fil-A on Wednesdays. I miss the walk to the bus that I will never do again, in the misty gloom of the morning and in the awkward tired shuffling of the afternoon. I even miss riding the bus, continuously turning up my iPod's volume to drown out the lousy 7th Graders' yelling.

I miss walking to class with friends. I miss hauling around percussion equipment for concert after concert after concert. I miss the late nights finishing reports and skimming textbooks because I was too busy watching Pretty Little Liars of Mythbusters or Sourcefed to do it earlier. I miss staying after school for weeks at a time until ten o'clock at night for theater rehearsals and performances, and even later on closing night for strike and cast parties. I miss the inside jokes, I miss the traffic in the hallways, I miss the struggles and success. I just want my life back, summer. Is that so much to ask?